When life gives you lemons Unless it gives you sugar, water, and a cup your lemonade will suck

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Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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If you're American outside of the bathroom, then what are you inside the bathroom? An American inside of a bathroom.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

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roses are red, violets are blue, im not going out with someone that belongs in a zoo.

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What do you call a remote that does not work? a remote that does not work.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut you racist bastard

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what is red white and blue? the french flag

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A black man and a white man were on an island. They lived in England.

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What's the difference between 50 dead babies and a three-course meal? One of them can feed me for a day and the other is a three-course meal.

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What did the old man say? Im old

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knock knock? who's there the stubt double vampire that's going to kill you;0

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Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

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Why did the black man get arrested? He sold cocaine.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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Why didn't Hitler go to heaven? He killed millions of jews and was an atheist.

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What did the mother say to her color blind son when he was about to take his first car ride alone after he got his license? Good luck

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When lives gives you lemons you might just be dyslexic, because life cannot actually give you lemons

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Whats the difference of a pile of dead babys and a lambrogini? One of them is not inside of my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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