Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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knock knock who's there? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!

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Why was the blonde on the train tracks? Because she was tied up by a madman on crack.

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What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

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What did the man with the gun say to the man without the gun? I have a gun

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Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was no traffic for miles and the chicken was in search of basic needs.

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What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

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So an African American man and another man of Hispanic, more specifically Mexico, are riding in the backseat of a car, who's driving? Probably their private chauffeurs, but most definitely not someone related to the Police Department.

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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How many Obamas does it take to screw an economy? What do you think?

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your momma is so poor that she is on welfare.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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Horse.

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hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

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Why did the car's airbag go off? He hit a boy eating his ice cream

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Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

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Did I tell you about when I hit a cat with my car? No, what happened? I hit a cat.

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what do you call a black man who bakes bread? a baker. you racist.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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Why was the guy tired? His titties were too big

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What has red dots and is yellow all over A poisonous frog

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What is green, and could kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table.

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A black man walks into a bar in Alabama, he then proceeds to have a couple of drinks and leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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