Dan walked into a jelly fish

What do you say to a man who just gave you a million dollars. thank you

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

Eating food: Ugh disgusting! Taking a dump later: THIS IS DELICIOUS! Man, you are doing it wrong... Waterworld was a pretty dry movie, I mean when are they gonna start making movies with a bit of wet humor for a change? SERIOUSLY BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY I AM NOT SERIOUS!

What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

Why the kid can't get off the water? Because your feet is on his head

Every week or so Chuck Norris does his laundry.

How do you stop a bus? You don't, and Regina George didn't either.

Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

a mexican guy, a jewish guy, and a priest jump off a plane they landed safely and had a great day

What do you call a Mad Cow? Dead. Pst, Mr.Cobb if your reading this- Hola.

Why did my bed broke? Becaus i had sex with your mom!

What's in the sky? Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it's a helicopter.

Today's Horoscope for Cancer: You have Cancer.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

Knock Knock Dude there is no door

u r stupid! y? cuz u took the time 2 look at are jokes! haha lol

What do you call a dead child? The product of a car crash

Q: What did the Lone Ranger say when he saw his horse coming? A: Here comes my horse.

why was the man afraid of the tree? Because it ate his mother!!!!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are polemicists.

What sound did the man make? Splatt. He fell off a building.

roses are red vilest are blue shes mine and if you take my place my fist will go in your face

Once upon a time Jimmy was walking home from school. Jimmy was then confronted by a a pedophile so he suddenly ate himself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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