What do a Jew and a whale have in common? They're both Jewish. Except the whale.

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A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

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Your mom is so fat, she weighs 732 kilograms.

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Q: what did the old man do to the little boy in his dark cellar while babysitting on a stormy night? A: told him to hold a flashlight because the power went out and he needed to find his electric generator.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Idear. What do you call a deer with no legs or no eyes? Still no idear.

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www.hurr-durr.com

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How many juice does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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What is Blue, Pink, and Green, and sometimes sparkles when wet? Grass. I lied about the Blue and Pink to throw you off...because I can.

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What's worse than getting your dog neutered? You being the dog.

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How did the Jewish husband and stay together forever? They didn't. They ended up in divorce like 50% of all other married couples due to irreconcilable differences.

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Why did the little boy fall down the tree? He didn't. He jumped.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman

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What's brown and hides in the closet? The Diarrhea of Anne Frank.

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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Why did Jerry Sandusky appeal his conviction? Because the judge wrongly considered inadmissible evidence.

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Whats the difference between males and females? fe

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a dead black person? There aren't 50 watermelons buried in my backyard.

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I forgot how the joke starts but the punchline goes something something something your moms a slut.

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The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

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How many Anne Franks does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, cause she's dead.

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What did the sun say to the moon ?? Nothing - they can't speak

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What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

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Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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