- Anti Joke

How do you stop a black man from bleeding? You give him a bandaid. What if he keeps crying? Tell him to stop. What if he cries more? Buy him an ostrich.

Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: The wheel chair.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

How do you prevent a drowning..? A: You don't throw the black man in the portwater

Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

I like my sex how i like my steak Pink and Bloody

If everyone in China jumped up and down at the same time they would lose all credibility as a nation for organising such a pointless excursion.

Why did the redneck leave his wife? To marry his daughter.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why did Sally fall off a tree? The tree was a man wearing a tree costume and was sexually assaulting her with his branches. Sally fell off because the cops came and the man threw her down. The tree man is still on the loose. If you have any info please call crime stoppers.

Why did the cow cross the road? -Because it lives in India and is allowed to.

anti jokes are really funny

A life-sized cardboard cut out of Justin Bieber was in a contest with a cut out of Liam Neeson. It was stiff competition.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

Why did the pig cross the ocean? So he could be eaten by Americans.

Your mom is so fat that her doctor told her to go on a diet.

Knock knock Who's there? Nobody Oh, ok

it was all Tagart

Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

Hey I Just Met You And This Is Crazy But I Am Pregnant And It's Yhur Baby ~GotDemChoozen

Two guys are walking on a bridge. One has long hair. The other does not care.