What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs waterskiing? Skip

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How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel

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Yo momma's so fat, that she got baptised in Sea World.

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs? A: Disabled.

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What's the difference between a bench and a black guy? A bench can support a family

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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Why is Diarreah genetic? It runs in your genes.

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Your momma's so obnoxious, your dad left.

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Q. What's white, has an orange bill, and looks like a swan? A. a swan

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Your mamas so stupid, her IQ is lower than the average person of her age group.

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I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

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Why did an old man cause a car accident? He gotf a heart attack.

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Why was the homeless man lying on the floor? Because he was dead

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Q: What did the 6 year old cancer patient say he wanted to be when he was older? A: Doesn't matter he died

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Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears? Because he's a rabbit

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Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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what do you call 10 dead babys lunch

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Where did grandpa go for his birthday The morgue.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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There is a bus full of puppies and babies with a plane flying above it carrying 2 tons of explosives. The Bus arrives safely at its destination.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

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a horse walks into a bar, hours later it walks out on two legs and the man who saw it all happen couldn't believe his eyes. The man then turns to the bartender and says, "I theenk eye've had enuf, Cut me hoff!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops