Hickory dickery dock, two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck 1 and the other got away with minor injuries.

Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and broke its head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be very mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

What is the difference between your mom and a vacuum? The vacuum does not use your mom to clean the floor since it is an inanimate object and can not control people.

have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

Why did the white woman press charges against the black guy? Because he raped her

One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair... Fuzzy Wuzzy has cancer

Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

rabbits running in my bathroom!

Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

Why are pigs smelly ? Because a cucumber can't walk.

What did the blind, deaf, retarded kid get for Christmas? Spoiled.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

What's white and horny? A unicorn

What do you call a black man that has a family with a white woman? A good husband and father who had a stable job in a not so stable economy. The current issues of inflation has made it hard for him, but his dedication pays his bills and feeds his family. He later will die a sad death caused by prostate cancer at the age of 47.

why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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