How do you ask a blonde out to dinner? Politely

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How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

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What is the different on a black guy and a bicycle ? The black guy steals the bicycle, but the bicycle dont steal the black guy. Yes, my bike got stolen ...

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Roses are red, violets are blue. my Mom is a hooker.

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CHAD'S A FAG!!!

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whats brown and sticky? whatever is coming from your pants

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A man is riding down the road on his horse, Sally. He happens to see a horse without a rider, but with two saddles. He finds this peculiar, continues into town, and has a fine day.

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Why's Jeds head so big? Curley wurly.

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What do you call a person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk? A person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk.

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller read? Tree sap.

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If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

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why did the girl slap joe? he had a boner.

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when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

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Q: How do you stop a hijacked plane? A: The plane can't be hijacked because the pilots cabin is not accessable until the plane lands.

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what's worse than 24? 6 million.

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Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

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What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

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Your mom is so old that her organs are starting to slowly fail and she must be put on life support or she'll die.

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Easter? A: Diabetes

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What did the giraffe say to the walrus? Nothing. Giraffes can't talk. What did the Scotsman say to the walrus? Nothing. Scotsmen can't talk.

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What do you call a blue horse with two legs and five eyes? A blue horse with two legs and five eyes.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And this poem sucks

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What did the cover say when it fell off the bed? Oh sheet!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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