A russian, a mexican, and an american are all sitting in a tavern. The russian ordered vodka, the mexican orders tequila, and the american orders a beer. When the waiter arrives, the russian throws his vodka into the air, shoots it, and says "we got too many of those in our country". The mexican tosses up his tequila and says "we got too many of those in our country". The american throws up his beer, shoots the mexican, and says "we got too many of those in our country". And then drinks his beer.

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How do you drown a dumb blonde? Hold her underwater.

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a blind man walks into a wall

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Why did the housewife become a farmer? Because the kitchen was burned down in a horrific accident.

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What did Selena Gomez say to JB? We're breaking up cuz u smell like French fries and you look like a poop

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A captain crashes his boat into a rock. He has the option to save to save his wife or his best friend. He saves neither and drowns.

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Why was the math text book so worried....… Because he had to many problems

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How do you make asian ice cream you mix it with a textbook

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what did the captcha response say to the man? ofdorno which.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

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A man walks into a bar After months of rehab he is giving in to his drinking abuse again and will ruin his life as well as his family

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Q:what do you do when a black guy is drowning A:you dont

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

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Homo say what?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. This poem sucks. I like math!

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Your mother is of a healthy weight and a pleasure to be around.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? - To rape you. Knock Knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

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What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

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Q: What happens when eight men throw purple at a rain coat? A: Mud-flaps, because electricity can't power a vagina.

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A chronic hemophilliac walks into a bar. He cuts himself and bleeds to death.

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What did the bus say to the short bus? Heh, you're retarded..

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flink geit, nei ikkke kneck bena hans jeh er på "forgiftnings avdelingen" third flor deen ask arund I mena i am the ønly guy in the world named Angelo Nero, so ull find me, srsly, got some ritalin on u? Do not respond, u know am not into drugz, but i waanna stay awak, get the detailz, remembeeer if you kicke his nuts, you get paid, if not go back. God jobb gutta, seriøst, kaffipiller ritalin, stimulanter? Not opiats, come with my phon so i can fuuk this netwerk,.. Ps: Okay break his leg, but ust one, hurry up remembr, cut his tungue (it grows bak jes) then tell dem you save him, you can be heroews, goat, tell fingern that when im bak, we are takin a trip on da limo, galz included becuz Mr.Black is the gentz. NO MOR REPLYES whre u? I want my phone not answrs her. Nero is a fucking demoppsn

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Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock, knock Who's there? Lemon Lemon who? Lemon know if you want me to say apple again

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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