John has 37 candy bars and eats 36 of them? What does John have? Diabetes, John has Diabetes.

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whats blue and fluffy? blue fluff.

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What's funnier than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans.

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This one time, at band camp, I played the trumpet.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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What do you call a person that smells like shite and chases uglier girls than him? .. . . . . . . .. . . . . . Smelly McD the smelly cunt

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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There was a man posting an anti-joke... He had no life

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The Pterodactyl species became extinct 65 million years ago, and thus if you saw one today, you would be immediately taken into a mental hospital.

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How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

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Why did the schizophrenic chicken cross the road? He had to go to the clinic, the poor dear.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

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So these two girls have a cup .

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How do you make a man cry? you torture him

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What's your blood type? Red.

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Q: What does the fox say? A: Nothing. Foxes cannot talk.

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Thats malarious! When something is so funny that... malaria

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Why did the girl have an abortion? Because she wanted a burger.

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Benjamin Frankin was playing with his Xbox...

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Why is the average lifespan of Black men in the U.S. only about 52? Hundreds of years of oppression and a lack of nutritional, liberal, and vocational education have put them in a position where gathering the resources necessary to live a healthy and safe life are greatly is incredibly difficult.

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What do you call a million pigs jumping out of an aircraft? Bacon.

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why is justin bieber so pale? Because he hasn't come out of the closet.

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you give like i give lomain

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Q: Why was the man wet? A: I push him in a pool.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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