Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

What did the math teacher get after he ate and he ate? A full stomach.

Why was the girl called stupid? She is mentally retarded...

What's fat and round and has a ballsack nose? Mr Chicken

If a bunch of midgets do the wave, is it a ripple ?

Eeny meeny miny mo, Catch a tiger by it's toe, If he hollers let him go, Because if you don't he would attack you and go straight for you're neck and you would die a painful death...

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt

Chris Bosh's neck

If you can't see what I see... You must be blind. If you can see what I see... Well I can't be blind because I have been able to see all my life!

Q: What's worse than burning your tongue on hot chocolate. A: Getting shanked by a homeless man

what is black and looks like a rasberry a blackberry

a guy on the street throws a boy between 2 priests

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

why did the elephant fall out of the tree? it was hit by a fridge. why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was sellotaped to the elephant.

What was the last thing that went through the WTC jumper's head? His ankles.

roses are red, violets are blue. Some poems don't make sense, Salad.

What's a boulder's favorite type of music? Boulders don't have ears.

Why do people go on this site? They have no friends and no lives.

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

How do you tick off a Doctor? You cut off his right thumb.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black And so was six because they were written with black pen

Knock knock. Who's there? the police.

What did the lactose intolerant boy say when he accidentally drank some milk? Nothing, he went into anaphylactic shock and couldn't breathe.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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