A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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What do humans and trees have in common? -If you hit them with an ax multiple times, they fal down

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what is long, white, and used almost everywhere? there are a lot of things that fit this description, so it would be highly illogical to make a guess.

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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Q. The farmer said where's my bucket A. Somewhere

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people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

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A Blond and a Brunette are falling down to their deaths, which one hits the ground first? Does it matter? They both die anyway.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually, 6's fear was totally irrational, and thus unexplainable. This sort of fear is generally referred to as a phobia.

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

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Why don't elephants smoke? Because they would be afraid of the fire, and they are much more adversely affected by recreational drugs than humans are.

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Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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What is worse than losing your phone charger... Being viciously raped by a group of angry vegans feminist mad at you for eating a burger, while walking out of Hooters.

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That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

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why did sally fall off a swing she had no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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Why was the orphan's christmas sad? He got a violent chest infection and died.

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what is white on top and black on the bottom? society... ha ha

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Why did the penguin die? It got eaten.

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The truth is he loves her!!

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What did the tourist in Africa get? AIDS

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thomas the train walked up to an old man and said nothing. mostly because trains cant walk, and they cant talk.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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