Why did the monkey fall out of the tree It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Peer pressure.

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A black man, a white man and an asian man jump off a building, which one will land first? Due to the equivalence principle, they will all land at the same time.

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks: "why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus being incapable of comprehending the complexities of conversation said nothing, and shit all over the floor.

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A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

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Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It had cancer.

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You know you are really drunk if your blood alcohol Is higher than .08

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Q:whats the wost thing that can happen to you when you find something? A:not finding something

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Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

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What did one alligator say to the other alligator? Ear

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What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea. A: Tsunami victims.

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Q: What did the shark say while eating the surfer A: Nothing, his mouth was full, and besides....sharks cannot talk.

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Guess Penn State Is Holding Jerry Sandusky Day this Saturday against Nebraska. All Kids 10 and Under get in Free...

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What do u call a dumb Asian. An american

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Yo mama so fat - - That your dad left her, and it's tearing your family apart

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

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how do you save a black person that's drowning? you blow up their lips

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Have you seen that ad about starving children in Africa? It was pretty gay

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who's a slut... you're mom

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I drove my Chevy to the levy. It was dry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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