How many babies does it take to paint a wall? depends on how hard you throw them

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Why does a clown wear makeup? So you can't identify him to police after he shoves your kids in his tiny car and drives away.

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What did the mother do when she find out her daughter left for the party? Nothing. She realized her daughter was old enough to make mature descions.

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What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

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Jake likes to have tickle parties with McCauley Culkin.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge. Why did Sally fall off her bike? She was hit by a falling monkey and fridge.

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Yo momma's so black, when yo poppa rides her, he says "Look! I'm Hiccup!"

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what's the difference between 7 and 2? 5

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Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

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What's redder than a red apple? 2 red apples

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why did the boy have no friends? cause he was smelly

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roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

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knock knock who's there? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!

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Your cat was in pain after after a stack of books suddenly fell on it. It's pain is extra-strong so you give it ExtraStrength Tylenol. Guess what happens next time? Nothing. It takes only 50mg to 60mg of Tylenol to poison a cat. 1 ExtraStrength Tylenol tablet is about 10 times that amount (500mg). You killed your cat. It's dead now and there is no "next time"..

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

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Why did the black kid die? He had cancer.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're daughter has terminal cancer.

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Knock knock Who's there? Miley Cyrus Holy moly, please come in! Here's your Miley Cyrus CD you order online Thanks you Mr. Mail Man

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A. Knock, Knock B. Come in

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What happened to thepeanut who went to NYC? He was assulted

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Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

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How do you scare a black man? Burn his house down.

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What did the man say when he put his penis in the blender? Arghhhhhhh!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops