make me a sandwich! what kind?

Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

Girl 1: I just can't find the man who'll make the perfect husband for me. Girl 2: Maybe you're asking for too much. Girl 1: Yeah, probably.

If youre African, why are you white?

A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a M.afia boss so they put him in prison.

What did the Scientist say after he created Frankenstein? - I just created Frankenstein.

Knock knock Who's there? Dishes Dishes who? Dishes a bad joke

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair... Fuzzy Wuzzy has cancer

What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

THIS ONE IS MIIINE THIS ONE IS MIIINE I AM TOTALLY TIFA I AM TOTALLY TIFA! This one apparently.

What do you say to two cows? Hey cows.

A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

Friend's sister: how many seconds are in 12 o'clock Friend: alot Friend's sister: WELL THEN 12 O'CLOCK IS A REWERJAJSBDKDJDHRJRJFHFKRJRIDBDKSBSDJ *slams door*

Why didn't the boy answer the phone when it was ringing? Because he had no arms to pick it up.

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

Wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.

Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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