A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, these two statement are obvious unless you are color blind

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Whats green and can kill you when it falls from a tree? a pool table

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Why did sara fall out of the tree? -she had no arms.. Knock knock. -who's there? not sara.

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What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? The Holocaust

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Whats black, white, and Asian all at the same time? A panda

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Do you know whats a joke? Something said or done to evoke laughter or amusement, especially an amusing story with a punch line.

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10 kids are on a bus. It's just a normal bus, it takes the kids to school and lets them off.

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Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

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What have the TV programmes Shameless, The Jeremy Kyle Show and Benidorm all have in common? They are all examples of modern British society

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Q.) What do you call a black man on the moon? A.) An astronaut.

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Why did the little boy die? His mother got an abortion...

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MR MR WHO?? MR MC CANN

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When life gives you lemons, chuck them at someone's face!

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Q: why does the man like men? A: because he is gay

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Why was the man in a great deal of pain? Because he was hit in the face with a sack of potatoes.

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Hey i just raped you and this is crazy so delete my number and keep the baby

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Q : What is the similarity between me and my friend? A : We both are crazy

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your asshole.

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hello i hav a growing interes in math and arithmetic especially when it involves pi if u are still reading this you either didnt realize that this was a joke or just didnt care but most likely it means that the first line interested or bored u and u wanted to find out wut the rest was u like????

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Why did Martha Stewart's skin hurt? My friend has a skin condition :( and is dying, skin cancer is not something to make fun of.

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What did the homeless man get for his birthday? AIDS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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