what are you mike bibby?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

This girl came up to me and said she recognized me from the vegetarian club. Her name was Jill.

Why was the boy depressed? A. because his whole family was slaughtered on the kitchen floor.

If a quiz is also referred to as a quizzicle, then what is a test also referred to as? A test, really. There are no synonyms for 'test' which would result in a humorous punchline; 'exam,' 'essay' and 'evaluation' are the closest possible answers and none of them provide humor at all.

What did Jeff do to the bench? He sat on it

How many ADD kids does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're people to you know...

Why did David go swimming? Pink sock.

Phew, I was like thinking all like "I am really into this guy, we can like chat like this and stuff too right?"

Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit and. the bear eats the rabbit in a whole bite without chewing...end of story...the end

Hey, wanna here a dirty joke? A pig fell in mud.

A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

Roses are red violets are red I think I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

Whats black white and red all over? A decapitated panda.

why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got run over

a black man, a Jew, a Chinese man and a polar bear walk into a bar, the bar tender says sorry no animals allowed in the bar, so the polar bear left and the other three ordered some drinks and had a nice time

Nice ass. Too bad it's cracked in the middle, though.

Pooring urine into your eyes, is a natural way to cure pink eye. Found this out this morning.

What do you call an arab with a beard? How cares what his name is just shoot him!

A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

Fill in the blank: Hello my name is ___, and today I would like to ask you why you put your real name in the blank? Posted by: BerserkSpoon

How many Jews can you fit in an oven? None, it's illegal.

What did jimmy get for dinner? Food

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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