why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

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"I see" said the blind man to the deaf man... On the phone

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So a man walks into a bar, And because he is dressed in such a way that was thought of as threatening to the general safety of the highly valued customers, he is shot eight times in the head.

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Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

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What happened to the guy who dropped his soap in the prison shower? His friend picked it up for him.

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How does God choose who goes to heaven? I'm just kidding, there's no God.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What's black, then white, then dead all over? Michael Jackson

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Math: "If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 4 in the other, what do I have?" Answer: "An unreasonable amount of bottles to hold in two hands."

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Q:what is the most annoying word that means nothing? A:every word has a meaning your question is invalid. ~Phish <3

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What did god say when he saw the first black person? He will do alright for him self

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems have endings

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how many babies does it take o paint a house depends on how hard you throw them

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Robert: wanna hear a joke? Robort:ok, shoot. Robert: *BANG!*

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What's the hardest part of rollerblading? Telling your dad you're gay.

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What do you call a deer with one eye? Injured.

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Q; What is green and eats rocks? A; The green rock eater... Q;What happens when you through a rock straight up in the north pole? A; The green rock eater eats it..

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a human being and one is an inanimate object that people enjoy sitting on.

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Why are hurricanes named after women? They're wet and wild when they come and take your car and house when they leave.

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burn baby burn your nanas burning

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In the movie, Full Metal Jacket, my favorite part was when the entire platoon beat PVT. Pyle with hard soap while he was tied down. Actually I am lying. That part was extremely cruel.

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Wenis Penis

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Good job, son.

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Knock knock... Knock knock... Knock knock... Unfortunately, nobody was home to sign for Marks parcel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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