why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "What will it be tonight?" He then promptly remembers he is on anti-joke.co but is too late to react. The horse has already shit on the floor. This is the fifth time this week that this has happened.

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Why did the man die when he saw the light? It was a strobe light and he died from an epileptic seizure

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

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Knock knock Who is there? Your mom Your mom who? STOP WITH THIS GAME AND JUST OPEN THE DOOR!

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Doctor, doctor! I think I've got an ear infection. I best give you some medicine.

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An arab says allahu akbar, people respect him as he is pronouncing his religion in his place of worship

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Why was Jimmy upset? Someone kept pouring liquid nitrogen on him.

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Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

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YOU

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Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

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Yo momma is so poor when she went to the bank the teller was like " you have no money."

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What's the difference between Neal Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neal Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON, while Michael Jackson enjoyed touching young boys.

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Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender asks why the long face. The guy responds because cancer is a horrible disease. Oh yah did I mention the guy has cancer? $

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What's worse than missing your flight? 9/11

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Roses are read violets are blue i ate a fetus now you die to

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What's been hit millions of times? A woman married to an abusive husband.

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A man walks into a bar he's drunk and can't feel it But he's ok

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Orange! -door opens- You fucking come over here selling oranges one more time Julio and I will have you deported.

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What is red and has no legs? Half a baby.

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Yo mama so dumb that she got mediocre grades throughout highschool and college which explains her less than desirable financial situation

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of its legs is both the same

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knock knock? Whos there? a questionable person. What? exactly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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