What did goldilocks say to the three bears? she was savagely murdered before she could say anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you make a dog drink? Put one in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter, he won't come.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the autistic man say to the woman? I have autism

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man loses his wife in a car accident He then fall into a deep depression then hangs himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the man have an extremely large nose? It just so happens that both his father and mother had large noses as well and nature took it's course.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What should you do if reading the antijokes on this site makes you collapse with laughter? There is no need to worry about this because it won't happen.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How many Obamas does it take to screw an economy? What do you think?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's green and shitty? A bootleg stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why do the klu kux klan wear pillowcases on their heads? they were going to go with coon skin but thought it was a little much!!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What did the air freshener say to the car??? A: Nothing. Air fresheners are inanimate objects

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I was going to tell a joke about your mom's vagina, but that's overused.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why cant kellen heller drive? She was born with the disabilities of being blind and deaf, thus rendering her unable to operate a vehichle.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

lucas sehnoun told me anti-joke was funny

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the Muslim do when he got on the bus? He realized he was in the wrong place and got on a plane and blew it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops