Where do cows get cultured? They don't, they get slaughtered first.

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So you have been really stressed lately huh?

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Of course, you have always found more joy in seeing others happy, that pursuing your own happiness.

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why did the kitten not eat its food? because its face was stapled to the floor.

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1)Roses are red... 2)5 black men... 3)dead babies walk into a large crowded bar before dissolving into oblivion at the literary incongruency 4)of the whole situation.... 5)yes chicken got to the other side BEFORE me #)stupid chicken (aka duck rose man help....)

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were you expecting a joke

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What do an eagle and a mole have in common? They both fly, except for the mole.

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what did the tree say to the other tree? Don't leaf me!

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Orange. Don't be ridiculous. Oranges can't talk.

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So after 2 years of dating, the man thought the woman actually loved him. So to find out they took a ski trip and during their day they were on the chairlift and the man asked the woman "Do you love me?" The woman replied "No...I'm just in it for the sex, but that's a nice ski mask you have on"

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Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim on land... it's called having a swimming pool

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Little Jimmy's mommy loved to see the smile on her only son's face as he ate her homemade cookies. Due to lack of medical knowledge at the time, Little Jimmy contracted diabetes and died before he turned 30. Unmarried and childless, he was diligently working on his doctorate thesis on Astrophysics. His death marked the end of his family line.

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Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

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Do you know why this joke isn't funny. It's punchline is bad.

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What happend to the girl in the corner? Idk that's why I asked!! :P

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Q: What do you say to a person in a wheelchair who fall downs the stairs? A: Nothing because most likely they would take an elevator.

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One night, I walked into a bar. I ordered a few drinks, and left later that night.

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what goes ha ha ha ..plop? We are all going to die.

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Son come here OK daddy Daddy what are you doing DADDY NO! DADDY NO!

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Knock Knock who's there? ... who's there?!?!?! ... WHO'S THERE ?!?!?!? ... stupid kids.

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Q- Where did Sally go during the explosion? A- Everywhere!

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How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

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whats blue and looks like a bucket? a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

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Why did Zayne have no friends? Because he is retarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops