A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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why did the women give her sister a present because it was her birthday

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will you like this joke my sources say no

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What's worse then spilling milk? Instantaneous Human Combustion

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two snow men standing in a field and one says to the other can you smell carrots

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What did the monk say to the 1 legged, Asian prostitute Nothing, Monks take a vow of silence.

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What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

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Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

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What did the nun eat for breakfast? Baseballs.

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What is the difference between menstrual blood and sand? You can't gargle sand.

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What's worse than Gordon Brown's face? George Bush.

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Why was the drunk man in jail? He had lost touch with himself because his wife cheated on him the previous night and to add to the fact she took his clothes so public nudity would be a problem.

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Bob is asleep. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT BOB

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Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

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What did the crazy asian man say just before he died? He didn't say anything- he was in an 18 month long coma due to a brain stem stroke. He left behind a wife, a 3 year old daughter and a newborn son.

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Facilitator huh? Sounds like someone that kills someone standing in the way, or bribes off others.

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HEY!

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Useful Information: *2+2=5 *4+4=9 *6+6=13 Q: Given this information, how many fingers am I holding up? A: It was a trick question. Batman didn't open the door.

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What's weird about four black men in a toilet? No one got shot.

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What's worse than being annal raped by a black man? Well lots of things are but being raped by a guy who has around a 7 inch penis may be hurtful I'm sure being cut open and eaten alive may be worse;)

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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jsahgfvdjfhgdehv? oiyduhgfdushy

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what good about eatting every night knowing that a african want

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What did the pirate order for breakfast? Pancakes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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