what do a pizza and a jew have in common? they both burn in an oven

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Why did the boy get nothing from Santa on Christmas? His parents died the night before!

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Q: What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? A: A SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE!

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A black man and a white man enter a public toilet. They both begin to pee at the urinals. The whiteman peers over to the blackman mid-pee. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype and then blushes embarassed by his own latent homosexuality. They both leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep later that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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A horse finds himself sleeping in the ocean. Immediately, he decides to be a dolphin.

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A fat man orders a pizza. Then after eating it, he gets a eart attack due to his high cholesterol and lack of exercise

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roes are red violets are blue we have nothing in common so baby were through

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Why don't dinosaurs eat other dinosaurs? They're all dead.

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Why did the kid get beaten up? -he was gay

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A deaf man sits down puts on his headphones presses play on his ipod starts to nod his head and realises what he has just done

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Christanity One Womans Excuse of Not Having an Affair Got Totaly Out of Hand

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Why are Anti-jokes funny? Coz they are not.

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If you have a dinosaur, how many bicycles do you need to do your homework? Yes, because chewing gums would ask if Greg can go to the handball match.

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There was a black person running down my street. He was celebrating because he just graduated from Harvard University.

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oh, you have a baby on board? I'll just drive into the the car next to you...

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How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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What did the butler say to the guest while his master is in the bathroom? Butler: "Sir, will you wait while the Master bathes?" Guest: "How long will he be, I'm quite busy!" Butler: "He shouldn't be long sir, he should be finishing up now."

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What's the difference between sand and menstral blood? I can't gargle sand

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A woman with big boobs walks into a bar and gets raped

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why did CJ cry?he just ate a pie full of meat from his favorite animal.Pig

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How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

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Why did the mathematician go to jail? Because he killed his wife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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