How was a blonde woman able to get into Harvard? She was smart and had a very good SAT score.

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What would you find if you shaved chuck norris's beard? A chin.

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What did the virgin say to the car salesmen? Hello, I'm really interested in buying a car today.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, There are so many different endings to this, it makes me just wanna Shoot Myself!

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon

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why did'n the baby wake up from his nap? because he was dead

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What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

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Q: What do you call a person up to their elbows in a horse's ass? A: An Amish auto mechanic. (this gem brought to you by Designated Dale)

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What did the goose say to the other goose? Honk!

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What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair

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What did the electron do after losing his proton? Trough electromagnetical forces, the electron simply left it's atom, making it become a positive ion. Then, atracted by other atom's magnetical force, it joins the other atom's last vallence shell, creating a negative ion, since there are more electrons then protons in the atom in issue.

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Two gay men are seen walking down a street in Texas. Actually now that I think about it homosexuality is pretty much outlawed in Texas. Two gay men are thrown into a Texan Jail where they spend the rest of their lives, cold hungry and alone.

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A plane crashes near an uncharted island with a low supply of fresh water and hardly any animals, except for a few deadly ones. How do the survivors live until rescuers show up? -There were no survivors from the plane crash

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A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

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Your mother is so large she finds it difficult to fit into regular sized clothing

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What did the black do when a man robbed his house? He called 911

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Diana- hey i havnt seen you all summer. Whaaat did you do over the summer? Paul- contract HIV Diana- ...oh ...

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why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

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Why didn't the man laugh at his son's joke? Because he was born without a mouth.

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When's the best time to kill a black man? Never. Committing murder is a felony and constitutes as highly immoral.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swings? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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what kind of dog can tiptoe

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Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a person and one is an inanimate object

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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