Man: Would you like to see someone Man 2: Sure Man: How bout the inside of an ambulance

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Knock knock! Who's there? Girl scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

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3 men are walking down a dirt path. One is a retired member of the US Air Force. The other of the Marines. The last one of the Navy. They are arguing about why their respective section of the military is the best. They lose track of where they're going and fall off of a cliff onto the spinning propeller of a US Coast Guard helicopter.

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What do you call a place full of large volumes of random, unwanted knowledge? The usersub on this site.

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What do you call a fat black guy in KFC? A guy who likes KFC.

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A priest, a jew, and a pirate walk into a bar. An exchange of dialogue occurs with the bartender and hilarity ensues.

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What's worse than a terrible joke? A worse joke.

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What is a black man's favorite food? It differs from person to person.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire? Lawyers exist, are alive and despite all claims to the contrary, can withstand sunlight, garlic and the sign of the cross. They also have reflections and whilst they may eat black pudding from time to time they don't depend on blood as a source of nutrition.

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Children and bretheren, stinky cheese Stinkyy cheeeese. Like this or you will smell stinky cheese in your bedroom

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Hay is for horses and other hay consuming mammals.

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Roses are flowers.

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what did the one girl say to the other girl? i like your shoes.

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Did you hear about the three Arabs that hijacked a plane? They drove it into the Pentagon.

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What's worse than a rainy day? Rape.

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Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

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Whats worse then the Holocaust? Chlamydia.

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Why did the sheriff cross the road? Cuz I told him to.

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How do you know if someone is vegan? They'll tell you.

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what is green and has wheels grass i lied about the wheels

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What did the Iraqi Suicide bomber bring on the airplane? His Kindle, he enjoys reading books

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Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first moneky.. Why did the 3rd monkey fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game.. Why did the 4th monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure..

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What's under the first mate? The second mate.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops