Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I can't see ~ Ray Charles

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot. WOW your racist!

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What do you call a muslim in an airport? A muslim going on vacation you racist bastard.

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When life throws you lemons, duck.

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You know what's stupid and gay? Idiots and homosexuals, respectively.

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what did the bull say when it got shot? nothing... its a bull

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Nickelback

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Q.what semtemce is a most used lie by a fourteen year old? A. Yes i agree to the terms of service, and am above the age eighteen.

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Q: Men are always very careful to have penises. Why don't women care enough to have them? A: That's a very good question.

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How do you know a baby is dead ? When the dog plays with it more!

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Your son Your son who? Your son who’s sick of having a paranoid mother who won’t just open the door!

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Why are anti jokes not funny.... Because they make sense.

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your mum

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Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

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Q: How do you make a plumber cry? A: Murder his family

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If God gives you lemons you find a new God

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What do you call a Harry Beaver? A beaver with lots of hair.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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mexicans fishing

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Q. What do you say when a baby gets hit by a car? A. Lol fail

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

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Why do bears go to school on Sunday's? They don't, bears don't go to school.

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Lad: Whats that smell Girl: Nothing Lad: That is right nothing now get into the kitchen!

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Why did the man starve to death? He had no food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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