I have an erection My mom!

How did the little boy get out of the forest? -He didnt, he was devoured by a pack of wovles.

c-? men, C-men

360 NO SCOPE

One day... Jack: Good morning Ben: Good morning The End.

What's worse than a guy staring at you? Two guys staring at you.

A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, did you know you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate replies, "Arrrgh, there's been a horrible nautical accident. Please call an ambulance immediately."

What’s the best part about knowing things no one else does? Nothing. I’m schizophrenic and can’t afford medication.

A man said to a performer performin in a concert,"Go break a leg!". The performer did not respond because he is perfoming.

What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

How do you get a cow off a swing? Hit it with an axe.

What do a cow girl and an orange have in common? They all are fruit, except for the cowgirl.

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Q: What did the gun say to the person. A: Bang.

What do you call a blonde with great maths skills? A smart person with blonde hair.

What did the one alcoholic say to the other? We are both alcoholics

Why did the cow cross the road? He probably saw a delicious looking patch of grass on the otherside.

Whats red and goes round and round? A baby in the garbage disposal

where did you get those clothes? at the toilet store.

What do you call Helena… A Shady palm tree

Who would be an amazing GOP VP? Chris Christie -Mitt Romney

What starts with an N, ends with R, and you arent supposed to say? Never

What do you call a man running around town with no clothes on? Naked.

Chuck Norris has appeared in several action films.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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