I read my Uncle an anti-joke. He is still wondering why it made no sense to him.

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Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

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Shaving your balls is just plain nuts!

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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Why did Jenny fail her driving test? She was hit by a train.

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Why was the pirate not allowed into the movie? tickets were sold out

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

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Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

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why did the kid fall off the swing? someone threw a fridge at him

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Yo momma so fat she when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

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Two pies where sitting in a oven when one of the pies says: God damn it's hot in here. The other pie screams out loud: HOLY SHIT A TALKING PIE!

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A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

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What did the strawberry say to the strawberry? Nothing because strawberries are fruit and can't talk

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Liar liar, your dead nans carcass is on fire.

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Why did Little Suzie fall off her bike? I hit her with a shovel. Why did little Suzie die? I hit her with a shovel and she fell off her bike.

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Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

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(waving left hand) Why doesn't Queen Elizabeth wave with this hand? Why? Because this is my hand.

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"My dog doesn't have a nose" "How does it smell?" "It can't. It bled to death."

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A man goes to the hospital he says to the doctor while poking his leg it hurts here. Then he pokes his arm and here. Then his head and here. "Yes" the doctor says you've broken your finger.

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

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How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

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Roses are red Violets are blue and oranges are orange nothing rhymes with orange

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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