Roses are red Violets are blue Today is Valentines Day I am depressed

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Why did the american block the road? Because he just ate at Mc donalds.

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Q: What are 4 consecutive fart's called? A: Fart's, unless someone gives them names?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to get hit and die

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How do you tell if an alien had been in your house? All your lightbulbs are gone and your fridge is pregnant.

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An albino and a jew walk in to a bar. They both order the same drink and chat for a few minutes before the albino must get home to his wife. The jew leaves shortly after, tipping the bar tender a generous amount for his superb service.

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Ditto, the Slut Pokemon. Ditto is a bisexual f@ggot who will f*ck any Pokemon that moves.

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WOMENS RIGHTS

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what is the difference between my pubes and my actualy hair on my head.... my pubes didnt fall off when i went trough chemo

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a young boy with no arms or legs log rolls himself outside where he gets struck by lightning

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How do you know when you've ritten too many anti-jokes? When you answer your own question as a rhetorical device

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A scantily dressed woman is standing at an intersection. She is a prostitute.

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How do you find out the population of Mexico? The census.

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WHART++EWEEEEEEEP FLARPEN CARPEN FLARP

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Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

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Do you like fishsticks? Yes I personally think they are high in saturated fats, but to each his own Oh I thought you were asking if I was homosexual

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What is it... Michael J Fox has a small one, modonna doesnt have one, Arnold Shwatznegger has a long one, the pope doesn't use his, and bill clinton uses his a lot. A last name

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How do you say a bad word in your language? Like this: "A bad word in your language"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

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Why did the black man not get to go to the party that was filled with all white people? His mother had recently died and so he had proceeded to go to his mother's funeral instead of heading to his white bestfriend's party.

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What happens when you divide by 0? Sadly, you don't.

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what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

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Why did the man fall off of his bike? He was hit by a car and died in a tragic accident.

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You are in an airplane, and you have 500 bricks. You throw one out the door. How many do you have? 499. What are the 3 steps to putting an elephant in a fridge? 1-open the door,2-put the elephant in,3-close the door. How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? You open the door, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in, and shut the door. The lion king is having a party for all the animals… which one didn't go? The giraffe, it's in the fridge. An old lady is trying to cross an alligator infested river. She makes it over. How? The alligators are at the party. She dies anyway. How? She gets hit by the brick you threw out of the window.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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