how do you get a blonde to stop following you? file a restraining order.

Q:whats the difference between a black man and a bunk bed A: a bunk bed can support 2 kids

my mom died because she was morbidly obese

what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

I'm currently on a seafood diet That is, I only eat seafood.

Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was strapped to the first monkey.

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

What's the difference between a man and a woman? The latter has two additional letters added to the beginning.

A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

A chinese man walks into a kitten store. He is a nice man in search of a companion.

What's the most confusing day in the ghetto? Fathers day.

What's worse than dropping you're ice cream? Getting your face mauled off by a German Shepard.

Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

An asian woman was driving along the freeway one day when a police officer pulled her over and arrested her, The officer arrested her because she had killed her husband 5 years ago and she thought she had gotten away with it.

Why did the baker turn off the oven? He had run out of business

How do you eat a candy cane? Shove it in your mouth and chew.

What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

Why was the clown sad? Because he was found guilty of raping and murdering 33 young men, and sentenced to death for 12 of those murders by a jury of his piers.

Stephen Hawking

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

How do you stop a plane? Land it.

What did the blind kid that couldn't talk get for Christmas Cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...