"Why did the clown fall off the swing" "he was shot in the face"

A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

What do you get with you crossbreed a lamp with a chicken? Nothing... You can't crossbreed an inanimate object with a living being.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because, 32!

Where does the Queen of England live? England.

How can you make sure your friend wont die of cancer? Decapitate him

What do you call a magic owl? HOO-DINI!

Why did Suzie fall out of her swing? Because she had no arms.

What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

Why was the man burnt? Cause he fell in a fire

Q: What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's Jewish.

I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen...

I went to a restaurant, but after I ate the food felt sick, then I remembered that I ordered penis with cum Popsicles so I knew it couldn't be the food

What did the Spanish immigrant say? Olah.

If Timmy has 2 apples and Sarah has 7 apples, what is the square root of the distance of Mars and Jupiter divided by the speed of light if X equals the value of negative infinity given the equation X(2) - E=MC/7?

Why did the rooster die. Because I killed it.

What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Finding a half-eaten worm in your apple.

A man is watching a football game and sees a comercial for a medicine that boosts testosterone levels. However, this man has no issues with his testosterone levels, so he proceeds to watch the rest of the game and then goes to bed.

What is the worst place to be in race if you're racing with me Behind me

Why did the man shoot himself? Because he already shot his wife.

An alien spacecraft picks up human transmissions from Earth. They continue on in silence and disgust.

Whats the difference between a watermelon and babies I don't have a pile of dead watermelon in my basement

Whats yello and cant swim A bus full of dead children in a lake

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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