A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

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What does a jew to enter in a movie theater? He buys a ticket!

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If Johnny has 5 apples and Susie has 7 apples, will they give them to the homeless?

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why did the boring girl get ditched she was boring...

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ed. Ed who? Ed Begley Jr.

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why did the kid with no legs get eaten by wolves? he couldn't get away

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How dis the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

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Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

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What do you call a black woman that flys a plane? - a pilot...

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your mom is so fat.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is an overused joke on a kid's cartoon. Thank me later.

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There once was a boy walking down the street. He got shot in the head. He died.

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An innocent man's home was raided by police, who accused him of grand theft auto. It turns out it was just a case of mistaken identity.

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Q:Why did the retarded student get called down to the office? A:Because both his parents died in a car accident.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9!

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roses are red violets are blue you little stupid a*s b**ch i aint f***ing with you

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Why couldn't the skeleton cross the road? Because it was dead, thus incapable of independent movement.

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What do you get when you combine a potato and an apple? A nice Apple Potato Souffle...

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Why did the drunk driver get into an accident? It was a woman.

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What did one fetus say to they other fetus? Nothing they were aborted.

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Girlfriend: Hey, you know whats the cutest thing ever? COMIC SANS Stabs girlfriend in the eyes.

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A: knock knock A: knock knock knock... A: door bell

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How do you make Yoda sad? Kill all of his friends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops