Why did the stranger sexually assault the woman? --Because he was a sexual predator..

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what do you call a middle-aged man with one blue suede shoe on, purple hair, pink skin, white eyes, no toenails, 67 fingers, 1 eye, a pocket watch, no clothes, and 8978967564567898765432345678765321234568909876543w245678909876543456098765323456-0987654367890-098765435678-09876543456789098765432345678909876543456789098765435678909876543234567898765323456890-987654345678900987654323456890987653234567890765434568909876543456899876543456789098765434568909876545678987654345678987654567898765434567898765478579458765456789876543223456789876543098765432123456898765432678987654230987653-098765434567898765434898765434567898765456787654567876 butt cheeks? bob.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A sad horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse answers "My wife was just diagnosed with terminal cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a depressed alcoholic drug addict whose children had all been diagnosed with a rare form of terminal brain cancer, and he decided to end it then and there by jumping in front of an approaching bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

So this fat guy farts. It smells.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

There is a black man and a Mexican in a car. Who's driving? The driver.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

19 roosters walk into a roller coaster

thumb_up thumb_down -10

RACIST JOKE Why did the racist cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man came home and witnessed his wife having an affair with another man. The husband and wife got into a huge argument and eventually got divorced

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Two men are walking down the street. They both don't make eye contact and continue walking.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Gary.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I got a new jacket. The jacket had real cotton inside the sleeves. The next day my new jacket was gone, but the one i bought yesterday wasn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What can fly, but is always under you? A flying worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I can't believe they been together for 16 years!! Who? Deez Nutz!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A fish walks into a bar. He proceeds to talk the bartender. "Blub blub blub" The fish sitting next to him whispers to the bartender. "What is he talking about." The bartender shrugs.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: Why does the chicken cross the road? A: To get hit by a redneck.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did little Susie Fall in the well? She had downs.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

think twice or at least think

thumb_up thumb_down -10

how many niggaz dose it take to fit in al lightbolb?? 36 ahahahh yall deez nutz

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why didn't santa deliver any presents this christmas? Because he isn't real

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you think would happen if there was a zombie apocalypse? You would just die.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why does the cow have spots? Because it was born that way

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops