How do you confuse a blonde? Try and teach her the finer points of Quantum Physics without allowing her to take any notes, and then test her on it.

A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

how many baby's does it take to paint a wall?? depends how hard u throw them

How do you get 50 Babies into a phone booth? A blender How do you get them out? Doritos

Q. What do you call a small hen that can't lay eggs properly? A. A small hen that can't lay eggs properly.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

What do you call a snake at a snail convention? A snake at a snail convention.

Why did the girl fall off the swing ? Because she lost her balance and the force of gravity put upon her was too great for her to bear, resulting in her fall.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him "why the long face?" "All horses have long faces" he replied.

Dwight Howard

How do you sink a Polish battleship? You breach the hull.

What's the difference between a white guy playing basketball and a black guy playing hockey??? There is none..they hardly get playing time!!

A family goes to a talent agency and performs an act. They call themselves the aristocrats

How do you make a clown sad? Brutally murder his children.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. The man apologizes, and the bra assures him not to worry. They both continue on their way. The man wonders what a bra is doing walking around unattached to a woman, especially this late at night.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He didn't he was chicken

What do you call a man who burns his country's flag on it's independence day? Unpatriotic

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot lacked flying skills and experience.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Q: What did Bobby get for his first birthday ? A: Adoption papers

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

what did the mexican cop say to the mexican drug dealer? can i get some of that

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...