Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

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whats up and also down? your mum

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Whats the diffrence between a white and a black guy? one of them is black

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Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he was late for a meeting

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one day a boy asked a Manican if it had a pulse it didn't

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Your son Your son who? Your son who’s sick of having a paranoid mother who won’t just open the door!

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What do you call a man who's arms have been amputated? It doesn't matter, he won't be able to pick up the phone.

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What's the worst part about being a black Jew? You have to sit at the back of the oven.

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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What is the difference between a blond and a mummy? A blond has a brain.

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Why did the blonde ask the doctor if she should get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anal surgery is the only solution.

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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Q. Why didn't the man tell his girlfriend about his big lottery win? A. Because it was none of her business.

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Nero, I mean it, I want you and your wife to have 15 million dollars, it wont buy you the happiness you seek, but it helps no?

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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What's the same about a duck-billed platypus and a duck? They both have a duck bill on their face... Duh!

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What do you call a blonde in a library? Lost

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How do you punish Helen Keller You don't, she's dead

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Lad: Whats that smell Girl: Nothing Lad: That is right nothing now get into the kitchen!

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what's worse, ten babies stapled to a tree or one baby stapled to ten trees?

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whats the difference between blue and green? there different colours.

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What do Sandusky and micheal Jackson have in common? They are both white.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops