roses are red, violets are blue, dandelions are yellow, tulips are pink, sunflowers are black and yellow, my dick is 13 inches long.

How many moms does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They make you do it!

Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

Justin

What is x + 12 That is impossible because you can't add letters

how do stick a dead baby into a blender and why???????? feet first so u can see the reaction on top.

Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

How do you catch a unique animal? You get professional hunters to catch the animal.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Trampoline.

What is the longest sentence that a man knows? If it is used it in context, isn't round and the speaker attempts to quote the whole number - or at least all of it known to date, then any sentence involving the value of pi.

HOLY COW!

what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

A black man, a jew, a hispanic, and an asian are the only survivors of a plane crash, and end up on a deserted island, what do they do? Die.

Knock, knock who's there? Steve Evans. Steve Evans who? You've already forgotten me? We just met on Eharmony yesterday.

Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

Whats Funnier than the Holacaust? A: Nothing you asshole!

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

roses are red violets are blue cookie monster is gonna eat you big bird is yellow you look mellow dont forget elmo to

What is cowboy say

More mindfuck: Your school is betraying you edition. How are you going to feel good about yourself, if you have to UNDER STAND everything you learn? Moral: If you dont get it, you are not ready.

You know that Duck song on youtube? I dont get it... ducks cant talk...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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