Q: How fast does an F-16 fly? A: Pretty Fast

Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

Whats worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

your mummas so ugley that it looks like it court fire and your family put it out with forkes

Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

i was in bed with a girl recently and she said to me 'I want tonight to be magical', so afterwards i disappeared.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC for his job interview

What is the difference between a black person and an elevator? Well, there are many differences such as the fact that an elevator has a series of wiring and mechanics, while a black man, and white men alike, are human beings.

Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

Why did Emily fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Emily.

Why did the young Mexican apply for a job at McDonalds? The economy is down and his family could use the extra money.

what happens when an unstoppable force hits an unmovable object? it goes around.

What do you call a black man playing golf? A golfer.

Titanic with will smith. Girl: I wont ever let go of you. Leo: Drowns. Smith: Move your fat ass over girl, there is like room for me and fifthy kids there yo! Me: Bitch if you need to float on a piece of wood where six of us could fit, im gonna drown you.

Why did the blind man have a poo Because he needed one.

A paraplegic wheels himself into a bar. The barman asks, 'What can I get you?' 'Nothing,' replies the paraplegic, 'I've just pissed myself and I need you to help me clean myself up.'

What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

How do you know when you have had too much to drink? When you ran over 7 pedestrians and are lying in the back of a police vehicle

Q)Why doesn't the blond have a job? A) he is 12

What's better than winning the special Olympics? Getting laid at the special Olympics.

How many jews can you fit in a car? As many as the compacity of the car can hold and how big the jews are

A Polish man walks into a bar and says, "Co za asy..."

why was the old man on the ground he fell

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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