Q:Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: Because she has no arms. ..... Knock knock! who's there? Not Sara, she has no arms and doesn't have the abitlity to knock.

What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Why are ginger's jokes not funny? Because they're gingers.

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

Why did Jonny commit suicide? Airplanes dont have feet.

Yo mama is so old, that it's becoming apparent that she is most likely developing severe senial dementia

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead."

What would be the worst thing to do to Helen Keller? Cut her hands off, as it would destroy her last chance at communication and re-arranging her house so she often fell nub first over chairs.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

What's white and horny? a unicorn.

Q: What's green, red, and covered in cookie crumbs? A: A dead girl scout.

roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

What did the blind kid that couldn't talk get for Christmas Cancer

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What do you do to a woman who has a black eye? Punch her in the other eye so that they match.

I got into an argument with my friend the other day. He contested that the onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I beat his wife to death with a coconut,

What do you get if you cross a motorway with a lawnmower? Killed.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Ok good, just checking. It would be a shame for your perishable foodstuffs to go bad.

a guys was walking down the street in Queens. a attractive young woman walked by. He was interested in here so he said nice things and they ended up going on a date. She had a big butt.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey.

I once did __________ (went to Hawaii, drank a whole gallon of beer, etc. ), but then I woke up. Works with anything, and people will laugh.

Poker face

Why did the little girl keep running into things Because she was blind

How do you make an ugly person not ugly? Put a bag over their head. With,, a smiley face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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