Why didn't the little boy hear the ice cream truck? He was deaf.

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Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

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Let's get some comments on this one! Everyone add a comment with a quote from a movie! I'll thumbs-up the best comments!

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Wanna know way i don't eat grapes? I hate Grapes.

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Why did the black man not get to go to the party that was filled with all white people? His mother had recently died and so he had proceeded to go to his mother's funeral instead of heading to his white bestfriend's party.

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What's the difference between a dead black man in the road, and a dead dog in the road? One is a human being that probably leaves behind family and friends that will miss his absence. The other is an animal that will also be missed, but to a lesser degree since dogs don't form a bond with people other than the family it shared its life with. In either of the two cases, if I witnessed the accident that caused the death, I would promptly notify the authorities so as to make sure that the driver of the vehicle that hit them would be subjected to a breathalyzer test.

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Why isnt Gemma a Surfboarder? .. Because She was a Stillborn. Why isn't Kate a Ballerina? Because She's paralysed. Why isnt Tommy an Olympic High Jumper? Because He's a dwarf.

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Your mom is so fat that her doctor told her to go on a diet.

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A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

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Q. why did the boy who just had his first kiss feel no emotion? A. He got hit a Croquet mallet and died

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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How does an elephant climb a cliff who cares

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What happens when you put the batteries in BACKWARDS in the Energizer Bunny? Nothing. Nothing happens when you insert batteries backwards

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What's the funniest thing about this website? Everyone thinks their fucking hilarious because they keep making jokes about Sally who has no goddamn arms and little kids with terminal cancer

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Two women were sitting quietly.

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear asks the rabbit does shit stick to your fur? The rabbit says no, so the bear wipes his ass on the rabbit

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If you were a pie I'd eat you

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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Irish sobriety

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home

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A blind man asked me out last night. I told him I was seeing someone...

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What's worse than eating poop for your whole life? Nothing really, you've got serious problems if you have another option...

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A man walks into a bar... And orders a glass of beer to cool himself off after a long day at the quarry.

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Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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