Call of Duty is a good game.

Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she didn't have any arms

Why didn't Clair get up all day? She died in her sleep.

how many strippers can you fit into a garage? as many as you wanted depending on the size of the garage, but after so many gathered in the same building it is a good probability that some strippers would leave.

Whats worse then finding a winning lottery ticket? Probably Everything

A: Hi I am a Mormon B: I know I'm one of your wifes

Why does the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have legs to walk and they are not able to fly across the road, like the rest of their bird friends.

What is black, white and red all over? Something that pertains those characteristics

Q what do you do when your friend tells you hes a homosexual A. you tell him that you will accept him and can still be very good friends

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

I like my women how i like my coffee. Without a penis.

How do you kill a dead baby? You can't, it's already dead.

What killed Hitler? His gas bill.

canadians

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

Q: y does obama keep raising gas prices A: he dosent want anyone to be able to drive to the poles in november

MAKE

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know. It depends how high the light is.

What do you say to a dead man who knocks on your door? Nothing, you shoot him cause he's a zombie

a man walks off of a damn. a damn is not a noun, thus nobody can walk off it

What has 156 bras and 927 pairs of underwear? Someone without a washing machine.

What's the difference between a Toyota Camry and 20 dead babies? I don't have 20 dead babies in my garage.

greetings ZOE. WHAAA BANNANNAS ROCK MAH WORLD. WHY DID THE TRAIN CRASH? ....BECAUSE THE CONDUCTOR WAS A PIECE OF CHEESE! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA. WELL LOVE YA CHICAS. PEACE AND BLESSINZ. SALUTATIONS, isabel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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