How do you get 100 Jews in a car? It is physically impossible to fit 100 full grown homosapians into a vehicle, therefore it will not work.

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why did the koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead

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Why is the moon gray? Why is it not?

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Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is also blue

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Q:What happened to the fat man that rode a roller coaster? A:He had fun

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What's long and really hard? The fourth grade.

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What's worse than finding a hair in lasagna? An earthworm crawling into your ear and feeding on your intestines.

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why do women rip you off? Because they like money

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Knock Knock. Please stop peddling your religion on my doorstep. .

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Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme The end

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Terraria

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A young boy asks his father if there will be cake at the party. The father tells him there won't be and tells him to f*ck off.

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identical jokes get different votes.

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What do you call an animal that is blue, fluffy and lives in the arctic? I don't know and that's why I'm asking you.

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A- Knock knock. B- Who's there? A- The interrupting doctor. B- The interrupt- A- You have cancer.

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Roses are red violets are red bushes are red oh shit my garden is on fire

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Q:whats the difference between a black man and a bunk bed A: a bunk bed can support 2 kids

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how do you get a blonde to stop following you? file a restraining order.

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a horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "why the long face?". the horse answers..."i'm a horse"

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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What's black and white and nailed to the floor? A skunk that's nailed to the floor.

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Why did the little girl lose her necklace? Because she got her head blown off

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Q: What would happen if you threw a red brick into the black sea? A: It would get wet.

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What's a foot long and slippery, a slipper

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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