Chuck Norris counted to infinity; by calculating the sum of a divergent series.

The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

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When is a door not a door? When it's a pair of titties!

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

Why do so many black people like watermelon? The same reason so many white people, do. Have you had that stuff, it's really good!

Joe Paterno walks into a police station.

What's green, long, and covered in forks? Grass. I lied about the forks.

Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

What do you call a big hungry duck? A duck thats hungry and big

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

Ill never forget the last phone conversation i had with my Jewish friend before he died due to the 9/11 incident. Friend:owejpq3jhp3qjopiqwejhriopjhaiophfioashiohwih13ioh3f2893hoiqehefioahfioahisdpahdfajdfopasjiopdfajdfopsajradalkdjakldja;hdfkl;adhlpa;dhfakl;dhkladhkadhlkhdjklahdjkgsdjkgbdqwgy3bi3grqbhgjkasjkdkasjdgjkadgskajgdkajdsgjkasgdad

why did the man pee in public? ... he couldnt hold it in.

Why was the blonde staring at the orange juice container? Because she was proud of her work as Chief Marketing Director of Tropicana.

saftey torch you can out it on the porch. saftey torch put it in the hallway. saftey torch scare the monsters away. saftey torch that'll be 50 bucks.

Why does Matt Daly do in his free time? it involves his finger and his own buttwhole

roses are red violets are blue if u wanna fight call 111 ( we r in new zealand)

What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

Scientists have discovered that the state of your hunger can affect what you say. For example, whether you choose to say ‘I’m hungry,’ or, ‘I’m not hungry,’ is based upon how hungry you are.

Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

Yo momma's so black, when yo poppa rides her, he says "Look! I'm Hiccup!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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