A teenager walked into a bar. A drunk man got angry and beat him to death with a club.

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says, I'm sorry but you have about four to six months to live. The man goes home and checks his million dollar life insurance policy.It expires in three months.

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Why did god create planet earth? He isn't real.

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: A bleeding penguin.

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i cant STAND cripple jokes

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Q:Whats Brown and sticky? A:Maple Syrup

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BOB:i feall like a hotdog JOE:u r what u eat BOB:no wonder your a d!(k JOE:f*** u

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84.52% of users disapprove of your post, plus or minus 3%.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop?

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Excuse me, I have a shitload of stuff to do, so you are Eliza huh? I thought that was just one person conveying something to someone. Anyway, what is your name? My name is actually Nero, but you do not strike me as an Eliza, first name is more than enough. You know, if you dare, Ill be back shortly, I was gonna shower but then again, I haven't moved at all today, so yeah. Saved you? I have never saved anyone well, excuse me then, see you around, worry less about people bothering with us chatting, hell they might risk learning something (not a chance, people here are fucking jackasses, with one exception, and I do not mean me this time).

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This week only, 2 for 1 misdemeanor shop lifting arrest. How can I do it? Because I can.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here." The other muffin doesn't say anything because it is a muffin.

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What do you call a person with no arms, legs, and teeth singing in the middle of the street while spinning? I don't know.

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why couldnt helen keller drive she was a woman

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What did the German say to the Rabbi? Hello. The German was also Jewish

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Why did the man's pants fall down? He was not wearing a belt and had recently lost some weight.

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Q How do you know when a gay walks into a bar A Albert rushes over and starts feeling him up

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What did the owl say when it fell out of the tree? Nothing. Owls don't talk.

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Whats black and runs really fast? Usain Bolt

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Ross Tumilty is gay 8===D

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A bartender walks into a bar. He serves alcohol for a living.

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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why did the women have to black eyes? obviously because her husband hit her because he wanted a sandwich and he slapped the bitch and told her to get in the kitchen!

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Doctor, people dont notice me anymore, doctor?... HEEEEEEEEEEEY!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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