3 women are on a plane. One blonde, one brunnete, and the other a red head. The pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. The 3 women find out that there is only one parachute in the plane. The plane crashes and they all die.

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock Knock. I said who's there? Knock Knock. WHO THE FUCK'S THERE, GODDAMNIT? Knock Knock. PLEASE STOP IT STOP IT OH GOD STOP IT Knock Knock SWEET DEAR JESUS GOD CHRIST STOPSTOPOHGODSTOPITNOW Knock Knock. FORGODSSAKECOMEIN. Hello, Mark. Oh, hi, Steven.

A man walked into a house, He never came back out as he fell down the stairs and snapped his neck, His family mourn him everyday.

a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. Who was the LAST one to hop it? the mexican because he had to clean it first.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Hitler said "Jew mad?" I did nazi that coming !

Roses are red Violets are blue Lemons are yellow

Why does ISIS want guns? Because they wanted to kill. Duh.

whats annoying and won't go away?. Aids.

Why did the man go to the doctors? He was concerned about his health.

A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. I don't know, why? A. I asked first.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A: A quadriplegic.

You know how I know you're gay? Because you came out to your close family and friends, who were all very respectful and accepting.

Why is Ellen Degeneres gay? Because she likes the same sex

The Lord told Moses to come forth. He tripped and came fifth.

What's the ultimtate guerilla camoflauge at night time? Black people.

what's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? a Jew is a person and a pizza is a food

What was the joke about that woman with altsimers again? Ironically I forgot.

NO IT IS MINE! ALL MINE!

How do you fit four gay men on a bar stool? You build an exceptionally large bar stool

Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

Yo mama's so white that she has to use lots of sunscreen to prevent from getting sunburned.

The snake rides the bicycle in the forest, the rabbit sees this, and says "hey snake, you don't have legs" "oh damn" replies the snake and eats the rabbit because of the insolence

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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