A man is sitting on a park bench crying. A blonde walks by and asks him why he's sad. The man proceeds to explain he just lost his children in a custody battle with his ex wife.

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Once upon a time, there was an ugly duckling. All the other ducklings made fun of the ugly duckling for being so ugly, and the little duckling felt bad. "Why do I have to be such an ugly duckling?," he asked. However one day, the duckling grew up and became........well, an ugly duck. Turns out he was just an ugly duck. The end.

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What? Yes.

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What do you get when you cross a pig and a cactus? A godless abomination that violates every ethical standard known to man.

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Why was the fat girl a virgin? Good morals

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What did the horse say to it's owner? It didn't horses can't talk

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A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

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How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

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Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

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Knock knock. Get out!!

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When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

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Knock knock Who's there? The Land Lord The Land Lord who? I am here to evict you.

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orange -banana and lemon say....... i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i want to eat u (RANDOMZZZZZ)

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Why did the guy to the moo moo cow say? Yesterday, I took a crap at the restaurant and the toilet got stuck so I stole the vehicle and won the lottery.

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Q. Why are most jews unemployed? A. They all got fired.

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What did the black guy say to the white guy running off the cliff? Watch out! You're running off a cliff!

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Why was the boy so tired? He had to carry his moms dead body up the stairs.

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Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

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Hey girl, do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I dropped one and I can't find it.

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who looks like justin bieber and is really cool? george darling but i lied about him being cool.

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roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

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Why was 6 afraid of 7.... because 7 was black

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Why couldn't the boy watch the R-rated movie? Cuz he was blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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