this isn't an anti joke but you guys remember teletubbies?

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being the worm.

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A girl hears a noise in the middle of the night in her kitchen downstairs. She walks down halfway through the staircase and asks if anyone is there, as if the intruder will say, "Yes, I'm in the kitchen. Want me to make you a sandwich?" *This will never happen. Movies are stupid when it comes to these scenes. No one will actually ask if anybody is there if they hear a noise in the middle of the night.*

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your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

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This is my favorite antijoke.

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What did the ant do? I don't care you whore

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Your momma so fat when she went to the beach she was to self concious and left her shirt on.

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What did the oak tree say to the pine tree? Nothing tress dont speak regardless of the kind.

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You know what they say about big shoes? Big socks. You know what they say about big socks? Big feet. You know what they say about big feet? Big hands. You know what they say about big hands? Cancer.

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haha black people :D

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what's the difference between two pieces of bacon and a blond girl? The blond girl is a human and it's against the law to eat her.

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Q: What's black, blue, and dead? A: My wife after our fight last night.

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STFU Stop Tickling Fuzzy Unicorns they really don't like it

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knock knock. "who's there?" dick. "dick who?" dick ferns.

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I heard that you could burn punds so I found a fat kid and set him on fire

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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Why did lil' Jenny fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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A student exclaimed "This test is a piece of cake!" He ate it.

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A blonde walks into a bar, and hit it head on, she is now in the hospital grasping for her life but the threatening grips of hell keep pulling her into the wretched plains of fiery wrath and despair... -Avery Vartanian

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You are basically asking if I care for you, care for me, and if this could put us both in risk... There is no picking at this stage, why would I use you?

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Knock Knock Whos there? Your mom My mom died three years ago, please go away while i cry.

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What do you call people in a plane crash? Whatever, i wasn't on the plane.

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A student asks a teacher: Sir, how much time would it take for me to do this quiz. Teacher says: From the second I give you this test to the second you hand it back to me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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