What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

why did the other chicken cross the road peer pressure

whats hairy and fat? I DONT KNOW YOU TELL ME RETARD

What's Big and Round? My Testicular Cancer

woman's lacrosse

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

EGGPLANT

Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if he tore his ACL last week trying out for wood chucking nationals? A: Woodchucks don't possess the ability to chuck wood, nor do they have ACLs.

Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

What did Kane Larkin get on his birthday? Cancer...

What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

My wife came up to me and said, "I want you to make me scream with 2 fingers!" So I poked her in the eyes!

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

why did the chicken cross the road? to touch the goats beard

what do you call a Ukrainian who eats pirogi's A walking stereotype

Q: Why didn't Dwight D. Eisenhower play with the silly putty? A: Because he's dead.

How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

caoimhin is a dorty carrot

2 Men Walk Into A Bar, I Forget The Rest.

What do you call a guy who died in a stampede? Grandpa.

Why did the kid trip over the rock? Because he was diagnosed with serious autism, and might die soon.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? HE WAS DEAD STUPID IDIOT.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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