What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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Water? I hardly know her.

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What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a statue of Mitt Romney? The statue doesn't change its position.

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how many drunk drivers does it take to drive home one and only one, if more than one drunk driver tried to drive home at the same time in the same car they would surely crash and not make it home.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes, how may I help you?

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Roses are black Violets are black A black person died

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? Because he had no arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Johnny was a potato.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

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What is the worst place to be in race if you're racing with me Behind me

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What do you call Justin Bieber's assassin? A hero doing a noble favor to the community.

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A man walked into a bar. He got drunk. What did u think he'd do, have coke-a-cola? Dumbass.

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What did the Muslim do on 911? He weeped for the loss of his many good friends and relatives

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Religionh

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Jimmy clenches his fist, a crack his heard. Jimmy begins to cry knowing his arthritis has gotten worse.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocaust Whats worse that two Holocaust? Dane Cooks Comedian act

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What is worst about the great white shark? It's hundreds of sharp teeth, strong tail, or subtle racism? Probably the teeth.

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what can you say about a midget dressed as a clown? he had a terrible childhood.

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Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

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Penis.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk in to a barber shop They each ask the barber for haircuts of their preference.

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What did the plane say to the twin towers on 9/11 - Nothing, how do you expect planes to talk, stop hallucinating and stop with the drugs

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"knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The SS, we heard you are smuggling jews in your attic, so you are coming with us."

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Why did a 36 year old Asian man stop in the middle of raping someone A: He realized that what he was doing was immoral and that it could scar someone for the rest of there lives and that he could serve a sentence of up to 35 years which would mean he would miss out on the special offers that QVC has to offer during this time

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What do you call a man with no legs, arms, or a head? A torso.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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