Whoever said "don't start what you can't finish" hopefully didn't think about having kids Cuz that would be horror Get it?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Umm... Why would it not?

Why was the mom happy cause her daughter had an abortion

What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

three gay men were sitting in a hottub. a condom floats to the surface. why the hell were you watching them?

How many people does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, more people would just make it harder.

andrew wagner

Why do Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles always smile? Because they enjoy there life even though there both blind.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he frickin wanted to!!!!!!

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

Whats green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

What do u call a gay dinosaur? Dinosaurs don't exist

Whats black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

Your friend is so gay he has consensual sex with other men, and enjoys it.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Put down your barbie. Get in the car.

I heard that the Boston marathon was a BLAST!

What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff!

A rapist leaps out a woman and yells "surprise!" and proceeds to have non-consensual intercourse with her. Later, he is arrested by the police and charged with sexual assault.

What did the cow say to the chicken? - Muuuuhhhhhhhhh!

Q: What is soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

A man walks into a resteraunt and joins his friends. Then he realized he had no friends. ~YN~

8--------------------- penis

So a magician was droving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

What is Colder than a witch's tit? Not much. It was removed for biopsy and kept in the pathology freezer. At absolute zero.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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