Whats worse than being a jew? Having all of your friends viciously murdered at a party that you weren't invited to.

what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

How do you get a nun pregnant? Artificial insemination.

Je veux avoir des relations sexuelles avec toi.

Did you ever hear about that rich Mexican?? No. Yeah, me neither.

how do you get 20 people in a mini? open the door would be a good start but i dont think they will all fit.

Q How do you know when a gay walks into a bar A Albert rushes over and starts feeling him up

What did the chair say to the guy? Nothing, as it is a chair and chairs can't talk

So Nero, what the fuck are you doing? XD

Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

Me: Hey mom Mom: Hey Son Me: Whats? for dinner? Mom: I dont know

Roses are brown Violets are brown What the hell who keeps shitting in my garden

What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after being hit by a train.

A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

I like food. But what's more than that it is necessary for survival. ASIAN!!!!

What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

What do you call a magic owl? HOO-DINI!

Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

What is 1 inch long and eats everyone in it's way .... my pet fish

Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

Hitler: honey what's for dinner? Hitlers wife: a jewwwsyy steak

Why did the Mexican cut his neighbor's lawn? His neighbor cut his lawn the previous week.

Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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