Why did Jonathan choose to watch something else other than Geordie Shore? Jonathan is intellectual.

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Why did the gay guy come out of the closet? He finally found the shirt he was looking for

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Why are kids with Aspergers Syndrome always banned from Mcdonalds? Let me repeat that: Ass Burgers.

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A fat guy, well over 300 lbs, goes to KFC and orders a big bucket of chicken. He gets his bucket of chicken and goes to sit down on a table to eat his chicken. A man walks up to him and asks him "are you going to share any of that chicken?" The man says "no."

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Chocolate makes everything better, except obesity.

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a man walks in to a bar he says "what can i get for a free beer" the bartender says "okay but first you have to make my donkey laugh" so he goes in there and makes it laugh and gets a free beer ant then the next day he goes in and says "what can i get for a free beer" the bartender says "okay but first you have to make my donkey cry" so he goes in there and makes the horse cry and the bartender says " i will give you a free beer but first tell me what you did to make my donkey laugh and cry" the man says " first to make the donkey laugh i told the donkey i had a bigger penis than him then to make him cry i showed him

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Why couldn't the dead man take a shit? He was severely constipated

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An atmosphere goes into one bar. Which is pretty normal since it is roughly the regular value of the atmospheric pressure on Earth at sea level

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Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first baby. Why did the third baby fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What's worse than finding a worm in ur Apple? Finding a worm in ur poop

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How many babies can you fit in a toilet? To be exact you would have to do all this math, so I tested it out myself and got 7.6.

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A black man and a white man walk into a job interview. Neither of them get the job due to lack of skill in the field.

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Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11 9/11 who? You said you'd never forget!

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Yo momma is So Fat? And isn't your cousin Chow Yun Fat? I think I know some of the Fat family. How are they all doing?

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Why is my son hungry? Because he didn't eat lunch.

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-I thought the lesson had started? -It has

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What did the dinosaur say to the koala? Nothing because the dinosaur is extinct and both of which cannot talk.

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Q. How do you make your dog stop barking? A. Take it to the grocery store. Replace it with any popsicle in the fridge.

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HOW LONG is a Chinese name?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue Oh, that's good to know.

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it's delicous.

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What did the man say to the cat? Nothing it had his tongue

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Finding this website has distracted me and has taken up a large majority of my time.

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how do you punish helen keller? leave the plunger in the toilet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops